Conventional literature has kilometers worth of matter on love and broken hearts. No one ever tells you how to break up with a best friend.
Best friends have their own language of love and as silly as that sounds, there isn’t a greater way to describe it. We celebrate each other’s victories, soothe each other’s fears, indulge each other’s hysterics and protect each other at every cost because, that’s what best friends do. Best friends are nature’s way of creating the best package deals for us. But what happens when you decide that the package isn’t working out for you? How do you manage without the person who will accept you with your stinky feet, impulsive decisions, anxious mind and bruised heart? When we say goodbye to a best friend, we effectively lose a part of our own selves. The part that had us calling each other all day, every day until our parents threatened to give us away for adoption. Or sharing minute details of everything that made us tick.
These best friends may be your go-to, the one you call at 3 am to tell how bad you screwed up everything, the one whose couch you can cry on for that boy until you wet the pillows and they would be mad at the person who made you cry instead of you. How would you then come to terms with the hard flip in the pit of your stomach when you still see them somewhere but decidedly ignore their existence them because losing a friend is more intimate than losing a partner? A lover may eventually not fit in but a friend always fits and it is so tough losing a piece of this puzzle because chances are that it can never be complete again. But the best relationships in life have the ability to turn toxic and sometimes it’s best to pull the plug on them to save your own sanity.
It hurts when people ask for them and how they’re doing because people expect you to have the most accurate information when the reality is that you haven’t seen each other or spoken to each other in ages and there is no way out of that question except admitting to a fact that’s going to break you a little more again. Sometimes, it’s unbelievable that you really don’t know how the ex-best friend might be doing. And, you will be back to that pit where you will wonder who deserves to know of secrets you wouldn’t even admit to yourself.
The ones we share our first heartbreaks, victories, joys and adventures with rarely ever get forgotten. But there will always be others willing to support your horrible ideas and see you through.
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